Reflecting On My First Five Years

Five years ago I answered the call from the elders of, at that time, New Life Church Magnolia to become the next pastor at their church. I knew the Lord had been preparing me to pastor a church, though I never thought it would be in my home town. I have spent a lot of time reflecting on that day and the ensuing five years this week. What follows are five categories and summaries of my reflections:

A SPIRITUAL FAMILY FOR MY FAMILY

Joshua 24:15 “And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

One of the more terrifying things about pastoring a church were all of the stories of how churches demand too much from a pastor’s wife or how a pastor’s children feel like they live in a glass house, with no identity of their own, only the perception of the community as “pastor’s kids” (and they’re the worst right?). I wasn’t sure what it would look like, but I knew I couldn’t subject my family to that—after all they are my first responsibility as a husband and a father.

What I have come to see is that a pastor has a lot of control in this as he thinks about the church family and leads his family to engage with the church. Patricia and I decided from day one that this place would become a spiritual family for our family. We need that. As you all are members of NLCC, so are we. We love our home group. We love attending services even when I’m not preaching and she isn’t leading worship. It feels like something is missing in our life if we ever have to miss Sunday worship or home group.

My oldest son, Welles, loves children’s church on Sundays. In the last year, he professed Christ as Savior and was baptized, something I pray daily happens in the life of each one of my children. Now, he loves coming into Sunday worship each time we receive the Lord’s supper. 

My middle son, Bear, also loves his 4-5yr old class. It’s a joy to hear him tell me about what he is learning each week. After Welles’ baptism (which he got to celebrate with all the other kids in the church), Bear spent the next several weeks “baptizing” Welles, Winnie, and all the stuffed animals he could. He often “preaches” sermons at home. 

Our only daughter, Winnie, looks forward to her 2-3yr old class each week. Winnie serenades us at home with songs like “Jesus loves me” all of the time. She talks about her “fwends at church” every week. 

And, Haddon, our last born, gives the nursery workers a fit each week. We apologize for this! But we’re sure that he too will grow up loving his church family too!

Patricia and I love the friendships, the care, the prayers, and the love that you all have shared with us through the years. You all are a spiritual family for us too—and we wouldn’t have it any other way. I so appreciate not feeling like I have to shield myself or my family from you all, as so many pastors do. Your genuine love for us is unmatched and we don’t take it for granted.

TALES OF GOD’S GOODNESS

Psalm 127:1 “Unless the Lord builds a house, its builders labor over it in vain; unless the Lord watches over a city, the watchman stays alert in vain.”

The temptation heading into this position five years ago was to think that everything will rise and fall on me—my leadership, my ideas, my preaching, my efforts, my care. I am happy to report, five years later, that I am glad the Lord helped me see early on that he builds the church and he watches over the church. I cannot imagine what this place may look like or the burnout I may have experienced if he hadn’t set me straight.

The Lord has been the author of so many amazing things in both building us up and watching over us. We have seen him protect us from things that would disrupt our unity. We have seen him grow us up (more on that in the next point). We have seen him meet every one of our needs as a body—whether they be a need of someone in the body,  financial needs, building needs, staff needs, ministry leader needs, or serve team member needs, he has always, always provided. After five years of witnessing God’s faithful provision, when our church has a need, I never wonder if God will meet it, I implore people to pray and I get giddy waiting to see how he will meet the need—typically he does so above and beyond our hopes.

I could tell so many tales of God’s faithfulness over the years—some of my own, some from others, and some from the life of this body. But the main point is that God is building the house; God is watching over us. Let us not lose sight of that, lest we begin to labor and watch in vain. If we will keep seeking him, keep trusting him, keep hoping in him, then he will continue to build us up and watch over us in ways we can’t imagine—and because of that our future is incredibly bright!

A MATURING BODY OF BELIEVERS

Colossians 1:28-29 “We proclaim him, warning and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone mature in Christ. I labor for this, striving with his strength that works powerfully in me.”

Within my first year, the elders and I established a clear mission for the church, founded in the Scriptures—We exist to glorify God by making disciples who grow in their faith in Jesus and their love toward one another. We believe the primary function of a local church is to glorify God and the primary way a church does that is by making disciples. We define a disciple this way: A disciple is someone who is growing in their faith in Jesus and their love toward one another, teaching others to do the same.

A growing faith in Jesus means to grow in our knowledge of him and belief in him in such a way that it leads us to love him with all of our heart, mind, and soul. We believe this growing faith in Jesus produces the fruit of growing in love toward one another. As we experience the depths and the riches of God’s love, it transforms us into people who love people.

By God’s grace and a commitment to preach the full counsel of God’s Word, we are seeing fruit. We have a constantly maturing body of believers at NLCC. People are growing in their faith and love, and they are jumping into roles where they can teach others to do the same through Home Groups, Recovery Groups, one-on-one discipleship, serve teams, kids ministries, youth ministry, college ministry, and Biblical Manhood (and soon, ladies, Biblical Womanhood!). We have seen children learn about following Jesus faithfully. We have students from junior high into college who are learning to follow Jesus in their contexts, as young men and women wanting to glorify God. We have young adults learning how to walk faithfully with the Lord in their careers and in relationships. We have seen men and women take their roles seriously as spouses and parents, using those roles to encourage growth in Christ in one another and in their children. The body is growing spiritually and uniting together for the cause of Christ—and it’s a beautiful thing to be a part of!

Thank you, brothers and sisters, for striving to grow in your faith in Jesus and your love toward one another. The full effect of our efforts and God’s grace to make them fruitful may never be known this side of glory—but rest assured, faithful saints, your efforts to grow up in your faith in Jesus and love toward one another will not be in vain.

THE GRACE TO GROW

Luke 2:52 “And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and with people.”

That verse has become a lifelong hope of mine. That I may be led by the Lord in such a way that I, too, grow in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and with people. By God’s grace, I have seen this in many ways. And I think that serves as a giant testament to your own relationship with God. 

In other words, your commitment to God has led you to show an incredible amount of grace to me as I grow in this role. It’s one of the things I brag on most about this place. Maybe it seems like a small thing to you, but for a first time pastor, it’s been a comforting companion. 

Growing in this role hasn’t come without its bumps and bruises. I know I haven’t always held up my end of the deal. I have let people down and those moments never sit well with me. However, due to your grace, patience, and willingness to reconcile, I have learned that it’s okay for me to be human. It’s okay for all of us to be human. The shared understanding that we don’t always get it right paired with the shared commitment to learn how to have real, meaningful, honest, and gentle relationships when that’s the reality we live in, has been so refreshing as a pastor and as a local body.

By God’s grace, we are all increasing in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and with people. Thank you, everyone of you, for the grace to grow up before you, yet alongside you, while also allowing me to lead you as your pastor. It means the world to me and it removes an incredible burden that many pastors face.

HOPE FOR THE FUTURE

Jude Doxology: Now to Him who is able to keep you from falling, to Him who will keep you to the end, to Him be the glory, the honor, and power. Forever and ever, Amen!

As I reflect on the last five years as pastor, and the last ten years of our local church, I am filled with great hope for the future. The Lord is faithful to love and full of mercy that never ends. He is far greater than we can fathom. He is worthy of of all the glory, the honor, and the power. 

Our future is incredibly bright because the Lord is incredibly faithful to his people. No matter what the future may hold for us, the Lord knows and the Lord will keep us from falling, as he keeps us to the end.

I hope the Lord gives me at least forty more years of faithful ministry to you all and with you all. May the Lord continue to mature us in our faith in Jesus and our love toward one another! May the Lord use us to impact this city, county, and world with the good news of Jesus Christ, the only power to save sinners, for his glory and for the next one hundred years!

Your fellow servant of Christ,

Kyle